Chet...Part Deux

All of you clamouring for more Chet stories.....here ya go. To your benefit, Chet is highly tolerant of my blogging - which makes my life that much easier. First, because writing helps me organize my thoughts and emotions (highly important in a new relationship)and second because I want to share with you to the extent that I am able before it becomes highly inappropriate and I find readers camped outside my door like paparazzi.

The funny thing about my relationship with Chet is the timing. I have known Chet for seventeen years. Seventeen years, people. We went to high school together. In our junior year, we were actually each other's first real date. Now, that was a long time ago so I am not going to pretend that I remember everything. I do remember that we doubled with my friend and her boyfriend to go see the remake of 'Romeo and Juliet' and I remember that when he dropped me off at home he was quoting movie lines as I went in the house. Here is what I remember most though - the next day I was walking the school hall by myself (remember I am an insecure, angst ridden teenage girl) and his posse of friends accosted me wanting to know how it went, if he kissed me, if we were going out again, if we held hands during the movie.....I was mortified and that pretty much put an end to that. Life continues on, we graduate, and I don't see him for a few years. Fast forward to the end of my marriage, the infamous summer of sinning....

During a majority of that summer, Lola and I hung out with a group of Chet's friends. For reasons that I am not really sure of, Chet was only out with us on rare occasions - it was usually about four or five of his buddies that we would drink with and party with after the bars closed down. (These same guys would be the ones that lost repeatedly in chess actually) The funny thing about this is that every time Chet would be out with us, I would tell Lola that I was interested in him - but he was never out enough to do anything about it and I was, at that time, in need of someone that would give me lots of time and attention. Timing was wrong. End of summer of sinning comes, Lola and I stop playing with that group of friends....Fast forward to my thirtieth birthday.

Lola and I go out to eat before my birthday festivities at the restaurant where Chet works. We decide that this is our new adult hangout, primarily because we like being able to order a bottle of wine and relax all night. We run into Chet a few times a month for the last year or so. Every time we are there we discuss my attraction to him and debate whether or not I should do anything about it. We almost always decide that if Chet was interested, then he would do something about it. After all, he is a very outgoing, sociable kind of guy and we both thought it was fairly obvious that I was interested. (I don't do subtle well) So we conclude he really isn't interested and enjoy our wine.

I would love to explain to you how we got from there to here - but I don't really know to be honest. Nothing major changed in my life the last month, I didn't all of sudden get super gorgeous, I didn't start wearing new Chet-attracting perfume, I didn't stalk and trap him....life continued on the same way it has all along. I did grow my hair out this year, so perhaps it just finally got to the length he likes - I am uncertain. Lola has a theory that he was one of those people that thought I was flaky and all of a sudden saw the light when I started writing my tell-all blog. I think it more likely that a mystical, purple dragon told him I was amazing. I am still uncertain. But it doesn't really matter anyway.

Here is what I do know. This relationship with Chet has so much potential. More potential than anything I have been part of since my divorce. (Actually, in retrospect, much more potential than my pre-divorce life as well) I feel like he is one of the few people that I have met in life that I don't feel any need to compromise part of myself to make him happy. He gets that my life didn't begin when we started dating, that I had responsibilities and relationships prior to our first kiss. He doesn't whine when I go spend time with my family - he comes with me, harasses my little sister, and jabbers at my baby nephew. He doesn't complain when I am out with my girlfriends - he just tells me to have a good time. He doesn't get annoyed when I have a glass of wine (or three) too many - he acknowledges that I get to make that choice without being scolded. He respects my faith, my values, and the good girl/bad girl combination that is uniquely me. This is different for me because I feel like in the past I have lost myself in relationships trying to be everything my partner needed, trying to adjust my life to fit the kind of life that he wanted. I always wanted to mold myself into the person that my partner wanted me to be. Now I feel like I can just be me, in all my dorky glory. And that I am appreciated that way. It's fantastic.

I know there will be some of you that think I am in too deep, too fast. But it is different with Chet because we have known each other for so long and because we aren't twenty two year old kids that don't know what we are looking for or what we want out of life. Do I know Chet's favorite color? No. (But I guess blue) But do I know what kind of man Chet is? Definitely. And that is what is important. Also, I don't do things halfway. Ever. This is one of those personality flaws/traits that I am aware of, but love about myself. Does this get me into trouble? Oh yeah. I would be silly to pretend that it doesn't. I could throw myself into this and Chet could break my heart next week. But if I am going to do something, I want to do it all the way, I want the full-body experience, all or nothing baby! And as Chet would say.....God doesn't like a coward.