Thank You

When I began this blog, it was purely for the entertainment value. I love to write, I have some funny stories, and I have a small circle of friends that like to giggle at my mistakes along with me. That was all that I ever intended this to be. But soon after I started, I began to get messages from extended friends and from strangers. I received stories from people that had made it through divorce and could relate to how I've come through. I had stories from people in the midst of the process that found hope from how I have handled it. And I have had questions and fears from people that think they are heading in that direction. I am impossibly touched by all of these, and hope that the process continues to be a healing one for all of you.

I think that there is still a stigma with divorce in society - which is surprising since so many people go through it themselves. Earlier in my divorce adventures I often felt like it wasn't something I should talk about or be honest about - it was something that was shameful and most of the time it made me feel like a failure. When you told someone that you were divorced or getting divorced, no one ever knew what to say. They always just got quiet and apologized - like you just told them you had cancer. It made me feel so hopeless. Or they offered sincere, but generic, comments like 'time heals all' or 'you'll get through this'.

Well, time does heal all. But before it does, you are going to make some really stupid mistakes and act in ways that may be totally against the kind of person that you are. And that is ok. That is the reason that it is so important to me that I am brutally honest in this blog. I want people to know that there is an utterly absurd side of divorce that most people don't even think about. And I want everyone that is in this process to see that is completely normal, you are not alone, many others have been there. I promise you are not the only person that has forgotten to get your trash to the curb three weeks straight or the only person to makeout with a completely inappropriate man just because it feels so good to be wanted by someone. All of these crazy mistakes that make you embarrassed to look at yourself in the mirror the next day are things that are happening or happened to many of us. And you are your own worst critic. Every mistake that you make reinforces all the insecurities that you have that make you feel like you don't deserve to be happy, that your spouse was right to not want to stick it out with you. Ease up on yourself, no one else is looking that hard or judging that severely. It does not make you a failure. The future is not hopeless. And you do deserve to be happy. I promise.


So thank you to all of my readers that are letting me share my voice on divorce. I am so touched by all of the support that I have gotten and I am so pleased that people are finding comfort, company, and/or amusement on my page. A few years ago I would never have imagined that there would be a positive outcome at the end of this process, but there is. Not only in the response to this blog, but also in my family, work, and personal lives. And it is my hope that it shows those of you in a similar position that there are possibilities out there for you as well. Just keep the faith.